The 2015 Ironhead Cup Draft Kit

 

 

Each player has been thoroughly analyzed including a break down of their strengths and weaknesses. The list below is sorted by stated handicap and for those Men that have competed in past editions of The Ironhead Cup and return again this year, their actual handicap during the Ironhead Cup events is included.

 

Hambone! (Hdcp: 7.2, Cup: 13.4)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Grain Alcohol appears to be a handicap doubler... Biggest Pro: Consistent iron play. Biggest Con: You think a name like Hammer would get you longer drives.	His first time at the top of the handicap board. Correction: WOFM Golf handicap board. Biggest Pro: He's dragging a new rookie this year, his son-in-law. Hambone! can spend this year blaming the guy sleeping with his daughter for everything. Biggest Con: The donut love continues for Hambone!. Lifetime Ironhead Cup record: 0-8.

Chippewa Smalls (Hdcp: 8.4)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
** New guy alert** Last chance for all future Target recruits. Biggest Pro: Indirectly gives off the country club vibe..That has to be good, right? Biggest Con: Hasn't proved it yet on the big dog courses with WOFM distractions.	He abandoned a lesser group to join The Weekend of Man. Bold, but unsuprising. Biggest Pro: He's eager and he's a rookie which hopefully means he aims to please. Biggest Con: Any hope others should have in him has long been sucked out by The Big Red Machine.

Crystal Meth Tweaker Doug (Hdcp: 9.6, Cup: 11.4)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Been pounding local course...Looking for ProV1s. Biggest Pro: Can putt with the best them. Biggest Con: Easily distracted by strategic interruptions.	And then were gonna find our best friend Doug, and then were gonna give him a best friend hug. Doug Doug Oh Doug Doug Dougie Doug Doug! Biggest Pro: Put together a few nice rounds last year, helped by putting together a few nice lies in the rough last year. Biggest Con: On-course stories from playing companions involving Monterrey, Mexico and a "handsy" pastor are distracting to him.

The Bobocracy (Hdcp: 10.9, Cup: 14.9) CAPTAIN, Ginger 1200s

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
No lack of self confidence here...Can it be backed up? Biggest Pro: Streaky good.Nice "club" speed…According to what his significant other told me last night…This is about Bob, right? Biggest Con: Thinks he can go pro - even while bay watching at most opportunities.	The Bobocracy ascends to the Captaincy against Macho Rod. A shoulder is likely to break. Biggest Pro: The latest tee time has round one ending at roughly 7:00 pm, which means it's likely he'll still be awake. Biggest Con: The unpredictability of his game and the influence of long-tenured Alumni at IX is sure to mentally crater him.

Hysterectomy Tom (Hdcp: 13)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
**New guy alert** and affiliated to Lake Citiers...What could be wrong with that combo? Biggest Pro: If that handicap of 13 holds up he will be in the running for rookie of the year. Biggest Con: Must overcome overpowering urge to re-watch old twins games...Must be something in the water.	He has a cousin Cathy who likes to travel to foreign countries with a funky uterus. Biggest Pro: Helpful at the Lake City Golf Club Invitational every year is good signaling for a rookie. Biggest Con: The only signal most Lake City rookies pay attention to at WOFM is the one broadcasting Twins game re-runs.

Sporadic Jack (Hdcp: 13.8,Cup: 17.5)

Undrafted Jeff

The Bobocracy

Strong command of his golf game and Zeus like presence on the course. Biggest Pro: Never say die attitude when it comes to finding lost balls - rivals Odysseus. Biggest Con: Ritalin is in short supply up north there ya know...Maybe 18 year old Scotch will keep this founding member on an even keel.

For the first time in several years, all Founding Members of The Weekend of Man will be in attendance. Biggest Pro: His handicap has risen this year, which gives him a few more holes to take strokes on, hopefully not from the trees. Biggest Con: Depending on the morning commuter traffic in Atlanta, Georgia, the 2015 quinoa crop in Bolivia, or a child in Indonesia who won't stop talking in his backswing, there's a chance of mental breakdown.

Sam Adequate (Hdcp: 14.0, Cup: 20.4)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Ready to take the next step up for WOFM IX Biggest Pro: Able to skillfully putt without any alignment. Biggest Con: Cake eater lineage should produce lower scores.	The Weekend of Man Alumni most likely to wear a white belt. Biggest Pro: Rocked the 2014 Pretty in Pink with confidence after posting the worst handicap differential in 2013. Biggest Con: How does anybody rebound after captaining the worst defeat in the history of the Ironhead Cup?

Kahnke Kong (Hdcp: 17.2, Cup: 22.4)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Professional sports team employment darkening the rose colored glasses. Biggest Pro: Strong drives to go with flowing locks. Biggest Con: Distracted or inconsistent play due to the lack of media coverage	He assisted in the survival of three fellow Alumni during The Great Anchorage of MMX. Biggest Pro: The only player to go undefeated in last year's Ironhead Cup. Biggest Con: His value-add is approximately zero. His team was still absolutely destroyed.

Bruce-in-Law (Hdcp: 18.0, Cup: 20.1)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Back from the injured reserve list - did the golf game come with him? Biggest Pro: Best clubs money can buy. Biggest Con: Getting the rap of injury prone...Could effect his draft status.	He's not good with ladders. Biggest Pro: He's good with beer. Biggest Con: He's not good with golf.

Six Percent (Hdcp: 18.0, Cup 24.8)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Year two - we are expecting big things. Biggest Pro: Showed some awesome golf skills last year. Biggest Con: In his line of work - we need to watch for "over value" of game play here.	He will actually know more than one other Alumni this year. Biggest Pro: He appreciates* the scenery. * Development opportunities thereof. Biggest Con: He will probably bring business cards to make sure every other Alumni knows him.  Ugh.  Realtors.

Tee Totaler (Hdcp: 20.7)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
**New guy alert** Getting in on strong coat tails… let's see if he seizes the moment. Biggest Pro: At least we know who is driving us home each night. Biggest Con: Rumor has it he is a white herring and does not consume alcohol...Never seen that on the course before.	A rookie we know nothing about, except that Hambone! Vouches for him. Biggest Pro: He doesn't drink, so the odds of a fall-off in his game are the lowest of this year's attendees. Biggest Con: He (and we) will never know if he's capable of increased golfing powers by following the Myran Bell Curve.

Good Times Johnny (Hdcp: 21.6)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Back in the mix for 2015 - did the time off give him the ability to trim down that 22? Biggest Pro: Almost spider sense ability around beverage cart arrival. Biggest Con: Sadly no superhero skills actually on the course.	His last Weekend of Man almost ended in getting shanked by an eskimo in downtown Virginia. Biggest Pro: Capable of playing with nearly any level of blood toxicity. Biggest Con: He may or may not make his tee time, depending on his ability to locate car keys.

Macho Rod (Hdcp: 22.0, Cup: 22.3) CAPTAIN, Ringo Stockdales

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Taking captain responsibilities with no leadership skills - let the fun begin. Biggest Pro: Hits the long ball like a champ...A very angry champ. Biggest Con: golf game has the consistency of a fine Chippewa Falls lager.	Without question, statistically the most consistent to handicap player to ever tee it up in The Ironhead Cup. Biggest Pro: One word:  Drones. Biggest Con: One word:  Drives.

Scottish Rob (Hdcp: 24.0, Cup: 26.2)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Solid play expected again this year. Biggest Pro: handles pressure with Northerner moxy. Biggest Con: Focus on water sports limits golf excellence.	Men are hopeful that IX is the year they don't need to wonder whether Scottish Rob will arrive alive. Biggest Pro: The most mentally impenetrable Alumni. Biggest Con: Mental impenetrability includes constant reminders of where to park the cart.

Undrafted Jeff (Hdcp: 25.0, Cup: 23.7)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Flirts with par like most men flirt with eagles. Biggest Pro: Addition of 588 Altitude irons should help mid-game. Biggest Con: 24% GIR has to be improved.	Captained the Bowser Big Oaks to the 2014 Ironhead Cup championship. Biggest Pro: He is the first and so far only WOFM Alumni to soak himself in beer from the Marquee de Sod trophy. Biggest Con: Since it was a win last year, and you never wash on a winning streak, his shirt has 12 months of yeast and malt in it.

Cinnamon! (Hdcp: 25.0, Cup: 27.5)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Don't let the fair skin and hair color fool you. Biggest Pro: Can drive the golf cart like a pro. Biggest Con: Needs to straighten out that massive hook...Or is it a slice...Wait - its both.	He won't sit down in the boat.  WTF is with that? Biggest Pro: He just doesn't give a f*ck. Biggest Con: He just doesn't give a f*ck.

RookRookie (Hdcp: 25.2)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
**New guy alert** Hearing big things from our scouts. Biggest Pro: May bring his rhinestone studded golf cart to impress the locals. Biggest Con: Still learning the science behind the game of golf...Hint - you want low scores on the scorecard.	The second time he's paid and the first time he's attended. Biggest Pro: He owns a golf course. Biggest Con: It's Lake Pepin Golf Course.

"Mark" (Hdcp: 26.9, Cup: 32.5)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
The Doctor is back in... Biggest Pro: Strong silent type on the course. Biggest Con: One of the few doctors who isn't a scratch golfer...How does that happen?	After a one year absence, The WOFM resident ear-nose-throat Doc returns. Biggest Pro: If his team sucks, he can emergency tracheotomy them. Biggest Con: He's the one who sucks.

Nerd (Hdcp: 27.0)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Will the calming effect of kids be a game changer? Biggest Pro: Able to artfully capture the essence of golf. Biggest Con: 5 putting as an average turns some heads.	The losing captain of the inagural Ironhead Cup in 2011. Biggest Pro: IX will be a needed get-away from two kids. Biggest Con: There's only one thing I can think of that has gone longer without being touched by Nerd than a golf club.

Citizen Dique (Hdcp: 38.4)

Undrafted Jeff	The Bobocracy
Needs to lose the "chicks dig the long ball" T-shirt. Biggest Pro: High fairways hit percentage. Biggest Con: Driving distance 80% down from PGA levels.	Captained his squad to the 2012 Ironhead Cup. Biggest Pro: Has the best attitude on course of any Weekend of Man Alumni. Biggest Con: The attitude is driven by an accurate self assessment that he is a horrid golfer.